What a Valentine’s present!
ONE man from the villages will forever rue the day he asked his wife to bring him a Valentine’s
present from her visit to England. What the wife brought him back from across the seas was more
than what he expected.
Last December the wife was invited to come to England by her sister who has resided there for close
to three decades. The sister facilitated all the travel arrangements leaving our friend from the
villages with no tangible excuse to deny his wife this once in a life time trip.
A chance not only to go over Zimbabwe’s borders for the very first time – but also to board a plane
for the first time. Surely who in their right senses would let such a chance slip through their fingers?
The wife was scheduled to return home sometime early this February.
The husband saw her off at the airport and wished her a good and pleasant trip. The wife was beside
herself with joy as they embraced and kissed. She was filled with emotions and was almost in tears.
“Thank you sweetheart! Unoda ndigokuvigira chii pandinodzoka (What would you want me to bring
you from my trip?”)
The husband laughed and said,” Undivigire Valentine’s present yechirungu. Ndoda kamusikana
kechirungu. (Bring me an English Valentine’s present .A white English girl will do).”
The wife smiled and left for England.
Last Sunday the husband was at the airport to welcome his beloved wife after her almost three
months visit to England.
It was all smiles and happiness as the couple hugged and kissed. The husband could not wait to find
out what his wife had brought him.
“So, sweetheart, how was your trip? Makafamba zvakanaka here?” The hubby enquired as he kissed
her.
“Very good, ndakafamba zvakanaka chose” replied the wife.” Haa, kurwariswa nekukwira ndege
chete. (My only problem was flight sickness)”
“And what happened to my present you promised to bring,” asked the husband.
For a moment the wife was lost. “Which present are you talking about, you mean you could not wait
until we got home to find out what presents I brought for you?”
“Remember I asked you to bring me a white English girl,” quipped the husband.
The wife was taken aback.” Oh! you mean that. Well I did what I could – now we have to wait nine
months to see whether it is a girl”
A storm is brewing.
On the day the husband bade farewell to his wife he was not alone. The same party that saw her off
was again present to welcome her back last Sunday. Amongst them was the hubby’s little sister.
Word doing rounds in the villages is that his wife came back from England pregnant. The rumour is
so rife so much that his relatives confronted him about it. ‘Naturally’, he told them in no uncertain
terms that it is none of his business nor theirs.
On the other hand, the relatives, (tetes in particular) claim to have noticed the pregnancy tell- tale
signs on their muroora.
And she is not helping the situation with her arrogance. “Ko zvinoshamisei kana ndine nhumbu. Kuti
handina murume here. (Why are you worried about my being pregnant? I’m I not married)
Our lot thinks his sisters are over reacting. Maybe she was pregnant already when she made the trip
to England.
